28th Jul2004

Movie/Song/Book of the Moment

by Will

Movie of the Moment: Chasing Amy

Song of the Moment: Blame It On The Weatherman, by B*Witched

Book of the Moment: Blankets, by Craig Thompson

10th Jul2004

1 Year Bloggin’ and Why I Chose The Name For The Site

by Will

HAPPY BLOG BIRTHDAY!!!!

Not only does today commemorate my one year anniversary of blogging, but this is also my 175th post! Boy, do I love a good milestone!

Wow, one whole year! A year ago, I was basically married, bitter @ the world, and living in Ithaca. Today, I’m completely divorced, bitter @ the world, and living in MD. “The more things change, the more they stay the same”. For the people no longer with us, I guess you can say they helped to “usher” in this new era…

So, I guess you’re saying, “Williambrucewest.com has only been around since April.” Yes, you’re right, but a handful of you know that, prior to April, I posted to a site known as “The World According to A Russian Exchange Student”. Those people have commented, “Will, even though you were an exchange student to Russia, you weren’t Russian, so the title’s incorrect.” Well, to clarify, originally, I was sort of ashamed of some of the stuff I was posting. Initially, I wanted to sort of hide behind a pseudonym, so I had planned to post under the guise of the exchange student who came to live with me.

You see, in my opinion, there’s nothing cuter than a foreigner who doesn’t have a grasp on America and the English language. Yes, that may sound exploitative, but I love when someone learning English will ask, “How do you say…?” While my exchange student stayed with us, he had a lot of valuable insight on the US, while at the same time he said things that were just too funny for words. In the early days of blogging, whenever I’d read an off-the wall news article, I’d wonder, “What would Sergei have to say about this?”. Well, as interesting an idea as that was, you can only walk in another man’s shoes for so long, and I kind of abandoned the “human interest” aspect of blogging. Instead, it was Punky Brewster this and Nsync that. Honestly, I’d rather stay away from the whole “Man, the world/America is so f-ed up” ’cause that’s what James & Jenn are for. They’re in the links, so check ’em out. At the same time, there’s just not enough forums for pop culture, so by-gummit, I’m here to stay.

We’re just getting started, and I’m only getting crazier, so I hope you’ve enjoyed the ride so far, and get ready for more years to come. I still don’t have a clue as to who’s reading this thing, but I do know about 5 of you have been here since the beginning, and I’d just like ya to know it means a lot to me, you mysterious masked marvels. Here’s to next year, and hopefully, post #500!

06th Jul2004

Open Letter To Usher

by Will

Dear Usher,

You’re an asshole. What? You need me to clarify? Ok, let’s get a few things straight.

I don’t even know Chili, but I feel for what you did to her. In fact, I see what you’re really doing here. Oh yeah, you’re “confessing”. you’re so sorry! How sorry were you on top of the Billboard chart?!! It’s one thing to fuck up, it’s another thing to come clean about it. OK, you told the truth. You think you’re off the hook? You’re not. You were only supposed to tell Chili. Not the world. You’re using this whole thing for personal gain! And you wanted her to take you back?!! Damn, you’re a dumb asshole.

So, let me get this straight: You’re not happy anymore, and it’s not going anywhere, so y’all just needed to “let it burn”, right? But then, you get a bitch pregnant, and suddenly Black Justin (I know you’ll hate that!) ain’t ready to be a daddy? Boo-hoo!

Why am I so angry with you? ‘Cause I just watched a BET stretch of all your “Confessions” videos. When you see ’em back to back, the sincerity goes out the window.

Well, I guess you’re a man now. You came clean. I guess you figure all is forgiven, eh? Well, that’s between you and Chili. You know what I think, Usher? I hope T-Boz and Chili go to some old voodoo priestess, have her conjure up the ghost of Left-Eye, just so she come drag your ass down to Hell. Then we’ll “let it burn”…

Sincerely,

Your Biggest Fan

28th Jun2004

Hova’s Idolatry?

by Will

OK, I’ve got a conspiracy theory. Bear with me here: American Idol Finalist Kimberly Locke’s single is called “8th World Wonder”. Ok, the other day, I’m listening to JAY-Z Unplugged, and he refers to himself as “The 8th World Wonder”. So, does this mean Jigga’s cheatin on Beyonce with Kim Locke? Is her song a coded confession, kinda like Usher’s, but with tact? Hey, I’d take Kim over Beyonce! Don’t ask why…

14th Jun2004

Last Call DC: Karaoke Thaiphoon!

by Will

Had a GREAT evening with LC/DC! Levow, Mike, Bill, John, Lip and I met up at Thaiphoon in Du Pont Circle for dinner (for the record, don’t go to Thaiphoon! Bland City). After dinner, I conned them into heading over to my stomping ground, Cafe Japone, for some Karaoke.

We did the whole ringer thing of “Wow, I think I might sing Drops of Jupiter…I’ve never sung that before!” Anyway, the place wasn’t exactly packed, so we were basically singing to this woman and her husband.

Funny thing about Japone: Ran into Tanya from the other night; didn’t recognize me….And I thought we had something special! *sniff* Well, it just goes to show you can’t sustain anything meaningful with a girl you meet at a party or a bar…

Anyway, we must’ve sang every song on Vestosterone, and then some. Eventually I had to dip because I had to make the last train. Boy, it sure will be nice when I don’t have to play Cinderella anymore…

Anydangway, it was a great night, and now that I know these guys are in town, hopefully it’ll be the first of many.

04th Jun2004

Creed…Breaking Up?

by Will

What a day, what a day…

Yes, Mr. Lohan, your daughter’s hot. But that doesn’t mean you can go around hitting people. It just ain’t right.

And Creed’s breaking up? But who’ll sing for Jesus? Who will trumpet The Almighty’s return across adult contemporary radio? What does this mean for the Rapture? Nickelback and P.O.D. are nowhere near ready to take over the mantle. The mind is puzzled, and the heart is concerned…

25th May2004

Remembering Kool and the Gang’s “Cherish”

by Will

The mall music @ White Flint has probably the BEST ’80s collection ever. They don’t play the cliche stuff like Madonna, Prince, and MJ. Instead, you get Johnny Hates Jazz, Corey Hart, Spandau Ballet, OMD, all the good one hit wonders. One song, though, especially stood out to me the other day.

You see, I hate Kool and the Gang. I hate them specifically for “Celebrate”, but I just hate their sound, kinda like I hate Earth, Wind and Fire. Well, there’s ONE Kool and the Gang song I like, and I think it’s because it’s not like their usual sound.

OK kids, I’m about to open up here, so don’t laugh. That song is “Cherish”. Most people may think of it as a cheesy 80’s love song, which it most certainly is. But it holds special meaning for me because it is involved in one of my earliest memories. You see, that song was playing following my father’s funeral, when everyone was going home and the cleanup was taking place. I never quite understood the somber nature of the event because I was 3, and didn’t really understand life and death. In fact, for many years, I just referred to it as the time “all my cousins came to see me”, because in my mind, that’s what happened. Anyway, I distinctly remember that song. I didn’t even know the lyrics back then. In fact, I didn’t learn the words until about 3 years ago when I discovered mp3s. Before that, I was just making up sounds, singing somthing along the lines of “Cherry suh-luv…”

Anyway, my point is that this song gets VERY little airplay. You have to be awake at 3 AM on a Sat night, listening to Kid Kelly’s Backtrax USA just to even have a chance of hearing this thing. But it played the other night, on White Flint’s PA, as I was leaving work. I really had a crappy day Saturday, but I think, in some way, I kinda felt a little better after I heard that. I’m sure many of you might wonder, “Why, Will? It reminds you of such a bad occasion.” But you see, I didn’t realize it was bad when it happened. To me, those were simpler, happier times, and in my mind, that was the best day ever ’cause my family came out to see ME. Well, today I know the truth, but it still doesn’t change anything. For that one memory, Kool and the Gang are alright in my book.

25th May2004

“Don’t Look Any Further” – Unsung Sample Hero

by Will

Song of the Moment:

“Don’t Look Any Further”, by Dennis Edwards

Yes, you’ve heard it before. At least some form of it. I’d swear that it’s probably the MOST sampled song in the history of hip hop, but this is the original slow jam. Forget R. Kelly, this is a “satin sheet” song.

18th May2004

At Least It Didn’t Include The Hampster Dance

by Will

So, we have support staff from all around the region in our store to help get it ready for opening. Today, one of the girls decides to play her CD while we’re working. It’s her “Songs To Have Sex To” CD. But here’s the odd part: these were definitely not “sex songs”. The disc included “Sugar Pie, Honey Bunch (I Can’t Help Myself)”, by The Four Tops; “Don’t Stay Home”, by 311; “PYT”, by Michael Jackson; and “Everlong”, by The Foo Fighters! It just goes to show ya the lengths some people have to go to just to get off…

09th May2004

Goodbye Yellow Brick Road…

by Will

“Maybe you’ll get a replacement
There’s plenty like me to be found.
Mongrels, who ain’t got a penny
Sniffing for tid-bits like you on the ground.”